Wednesdays and a Thank You.

Wednesdays are apparently the days for drastic change for my mom.  We were admitted to the hospital on a Wednesday, and exactly 4 weeks later is when we were transferred to rehab.  We are happy, and scared, and excited, and petrified for this next step.  I think a lot of the fear comes from the unknown.  Not knowing how she will do, not knowing how she will heal, not knowing when she will feel like herself again. I cannot believe it has been 4 weeks.  It has felt like both the longest and the shortest for weeks of my life.  The me who woke up that Wednesday before everything transpired seems so far away.  Replaced with a little girl who cries a bit easier and who is desperately awaiting the return of normal.  This is the new normal friend, time to get on board.

My mom is still really sick and because of the different meds, she spends much of her time itching and nauseous, and we are now having difficulty keeping her blood pressure high enough to get out of bed.  It's frustrating because we want her to be able to take as much away from rehab as possible, and when you are puking you are not able to learn how to walk again.  I want to see her get better.  Now.

Hopefully I will soon acquire more patience.

Just some medical updates for those that are following and praying.
She will forever live with congestive heart failure, though we hope as she continues to improve she will only need the support of meds.
Her kidneys are still recovering, but the permanent dialysis line was removed.
She chose to have a PICC line put in.  Not sure how long it will stay, but IV starts and blood draws were getting traumatic and taking at least 6 tries every time.  She needed them daily.  With the PICC line they can draw blood and give IV meds whenever needed.
They stopped her IV antibiotics yesterday.  I'm hoping this helps with the itching.  I'm nervous that she might develop an infection without them, however this is not something we want constantly pumped into her system.
We are going to continue to wait on the foot.  Not sure what will happen there, but the last time I saw it the top knuckles of her toes had started to turn pink.  We are cautiously optimistic.  Most likely something will have to be amputated, but we will wait until there is a need and give her tissue a chance to regrow.
There is something going on with her liver.  We will follow up outpatient.
She has an internal defibrillator/pacemaker.  We are hoping it never has to be used, but it is there if she needs it since she went into a fatal arrhythmia in the hospital that they were not able to change through less invasive measures.
She needs to eat more, but struggles with the nausea and the fact that she eats three bites of food and calls it a meal for the past month.  She has lost probably 20 lbs in the past month.  She has a few meal requests if people are willing to cook small quantities :)
She is now doing physical therapy, occupational therapy, and speech therapy while in Rehab.
Rehab will most likely be 2 weeks. So possible discharge next week.  That is exciting and scary. We will need help.  She will hopefully be able to learn to walk with a walker but she will need someone around often.  Visitors and rides to the doctors will be much needed and appreciated.  Let us know if you are at all able to help :)


One glimmering awesome moment: my mom was able to shower yesterday for the first time in a month.  Granted she almost passed out trying to make it back to the bed, but she showered none the less. We will take little awesome moments all day long.

On a completely different note, I want to cry my eyes out and say thank you for everyone who has helped us.

Thank you for the meals that were brought.
Thank you for the ceilings and walls that were painted.
Thank you for the plants that were dug up.
Thank you for the horrendous wall paper that was ripped down.
Thank you for the gifts you have bought for us.
Thank you for the cards that were sent to my mom.
Thank you for the help moving all of my moms earthly possessions into my garage and basement.
Thank you for the prayers.
Thank you for the encouragement.
Thank you for holding onto hope when we couldn't.
Thank you for not expecting us to walk around happy.
Thank you for holding me when I cried.
Thank you for the offer of rides down the line.
Thank you for loving me, my family, and my unborn babe.

I don't think we can say thank you enough.  This is a crappy road to walk and I cannot imagine how it must feel for those who have to walk it alone. I am learning more and more that life is meant to be lived within a community. We are so grateful to have the love and support of our family, friends, and community.  People who have known us for a long time, and people who are just hearing our story now.  Thank you for coming along side us.  We have a lot more walking to do, but I would rather have a long walk together than a short one all alone.  God is still good.  My mom is still here.  And we will chose to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

Last tangent.  We were supposed to have our annual Goat Fest on August 4th but it has been cancelled.  We would love to just postpone it and do it in the fall, but we are not sure what that looks like with the impending birth of our child in October.  So for right now it is on hold, and we will hopefully be able to throw a rocking party next year.